So this morning, I find myself staring at a blank piece of paper where I've written the heading, "Why do I want to go to Kenya?"
I'm so frustrated because I am unable to articulate part of that answer.
So underneath the heading I wrote these questions:
1. What is it that drives my passion? (seemingly, to take part in work with global missions)
2. Where does this passion come from?
3. How can I use my gifts and talents with all of this?
The good news: God knows my heart, He knows the answer to ALL of these questions
The frustrating news: He hasn't allowed me to be privy to parts of these questions...yet.
I know this for sure. I am gifted with mercy. I can literally feel/take on, the pain others experience at times. That causes me to feel an urgency to help people in extremely difficult situations. I can see how that would fit in nicely. People that do not have their basic needs met definitely apply to this and I know that along with meeting their physical needs, the real way to give them hope and rest is through Christ.
But why Kenya? Why globally? Why am I not AS passionate about staying here in the U.S. and doing the same thing? This is what KILLS me.....I don't know! At the same time, who am I to doubt a strong desire that God has given me?
I realized the importance of knowing my own strengths, passions, and desires today. My life is supposed to be lived to help others know perfect love. I am to be effective in that job. How am I supposed to be effective without knowing which areas I am to show that love?
**side note...I could NOT figure out for the life of me whether or not I should put 'effective' or 'affective' in the sentences above :) So if I am wrong, pardon the error**
Big lesson learned: A key element to living a life that glorifies God is KNOWING yourself.
I'm preeetty sure that if I ask God to help me do this...He would be more than glad to oblige :)
1 comments:
Kenya is a long way off, Mandy, but it's utterly fantastic that you have such a passion about going. You are a truly wonderful blessing and encouragement to our church body and your honesty is truly appreciated.
My question and point of encouragement would be to ask what you are currently doing to invest and help other people right now, not only on a practical level, but a personal one as well?
In my experience, if you want clarity from God, it comes through serving him the way you were wired to.
You don't have to go to Kenya to help change people's lives. You can start doing that right now, if you're willing.
You've got a powerful testimony to share but are you really showing the love of Christ to all the people in your life...or are you a bit too hung up on questions about yourself right now?
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