the geeeeetar (a.k.a. - guitar)

So...I got a guitar for Christmas. She looks a lot like the one above. For lack of a better name, let's call her "Pinky." To learn to play a guitar, such as Pinky, has been a dream of mine for....yeaaarrrss. Currently (literally as I'm typing this post) my fingers are throbbing in pain. It seems that playing a guitar involves a certain amount of pain...but let me tell you...it's totally worth it.

Since my first lesson last week, I have used almost every free moment of my time to nail down "Sweet Caroline" by Mr. Neil Diamond. Now when I say "nail down" what I really mean is attempting to strum the chords in a manner that slightly resembles this song. I honestly can not wait until I am able to play this puppy well enough that I can actually sing along. Then I'd be like...a one (wo)man band.

So in the next few weeks I am hoping for severely calloused fingers and rock star results. :) We shall see.

Regardless, I am excited. I think God knows exactly what we need when we need it...and he knew I needed Pinky. Learning to play has been so fun.

God is cool like that...he knows what fills our hearts with joy :)

Encouragement

Saw David Crowder Band in concert yesterday. They were amazing! I love their song Everything Glorious. The lyrics say...

You make everything glorious

And I am Yours

What does that make me?

The definition of glorious in the dictionary says: marked by great beauty or splendor

So yes...if God made everything glorious, and we are His....what does that make us?

A creation marked by great beauty or splendor.

Put that little fact in your pocket** and carry it around with you :)

**note: I guess you could write this truth down and literally put it in your pocket...but when I was referring to pocket I meant more of a figurative "pocket"....you get the gist ;)

I am reading a book, "Who Calls Me Beautiful?  Finding Our True Image in the Mirror of God" and I had to share this part with you...

Finally, we must hear what God has to say about us.

Before the beginning of time, I knew you.  I knew what color your eyes would be, and I could hear the sound of your laughter.  Like a proud father who carries a picture of his daughter, I carried the image of you in My eyes, for you were created in My image. Before the beginning of time, I chose you.  I spoke your name into the heavens, and I smiled as its melody resounded off the walls of My heart.

You are Mine.  My love for you extends farther than the stars in the sky and deeper than any ocean.  You are My pearl of great price, the one for whom I gave everything.  I cradle you in the palm of My hand.  I love you even in the face of your failure.  Nothing you say or do can cause Me to stop loving you.  I am relentless in My pursuit of you.  Run from Me--I will love you.  Spurn Me--I will love you.  Reject yourself--I will love you.  You see, My love for you was slain before the foundations of the world and I have never regretted the sacrifice I made for you at Calvary.

When I see every part of who you are, I marvel at the work of My hands, for I whispered words of longing and desire and you came into existence.  You are beautiful, and I take pleasure in you--heart, mind, and body.  You are My desire.  When you turn your head in shame and despise at what I have made, still I reach for you with gentle passion.  You are My beloved and I am yours. 

(Author's adaptation from 1 John 3:2; Isaiah 43:1; Matthew 13:46; Ephesians 1:4; Revelation 13:8; Psalm 194:4; Song of Solomon 7:10; 6:3)

Worship

I had an awesome time at Providence (a church in West Chester) tonight. I had never been, and didn't know what to expect, but when I got there the place was packed! We started with worship, an awesome sermon, and then finished it up with worship. One of my favorite things to do is be in a room where people are singing to God and to just be still and quiet and listen to it all. Hearing other people lift their voices as a way to show love to God is such a beautiful thing to me.

They played one of my faaaaavorite hymns "Come Thou Fount." I am normally not a hymn girl (except for a few), but this song is just so beautiful and powerful to me! Here is my favorite part of the song...

Jesus sought me when a stranger
Wandering from the fold of God
He, to rescue me from danger,
Interposed His precious blood;
How His kindness yet pursues me
Mortal tongue can never tell,
Clothed in flesh, till death shall loose me
I cannot proclaim it well.

O to grace how great a debtor
Daily I’m constrained to be!
Let Thy goodness, like a fetter,
Bind my wandering heart to Thee.
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,
Prone to leave the God I love;
Here’s my heart, O take and seal it,
Seal it for Thy courts above.

You can listen to David Crowder Band sing it on this video on youtube

...are any of those words true for you?

Seriously God, Where Are You?

Although I may be an introvert, I love hanging out with people.  Yes, I do need my alone time or the 'tude starts to come out, but for the most part being with friends and family is something that lifts me up.

Let's bring God into this.  Yes, from my blog it's pretty clear that I am a Christian and believe in God.  Great.  Wonderful.  Along with that comes many perks...one being that I get to spend my afterlife (eternity-ish) being joyful beyond my wildest dreams.

So when I get to heaven I'll get to meet God.  Hang out with him.  

But what about now?  Yes everyone tells me I need to...

"Talk to Him"

"Tell Him everything"

"Spend time with Him"

And this can happen by doing the following...

praying

reading the Bible

singing worship songs

serving other people

etc.

I get it.  I understand what I need to do to hang out with God.  But you can't tell me that it is not REALLY difficult to chill with someone you can't see, can't audibly hear (unless you are Moses), or can't even hug.  

It's got to be possible to "hang out" with God.  Two years ago, closer to when I first became a Christian, I had no problem with this.  I could literally spend an hour or two reading and praying and felt as though I had really spent time with God, that He was completely present.

Maybe it's that whole feelings piece.  No I can't feel God, but that doesn't mean He isn't there.  He's always there.  He's everywhere.  I do believe that, but when I am hurting or need comfort and I know it can only come from God...it would be great just to get a hug from Him.  

I'd like to bring this blog to a close with a nice "lesson learned" paragraph or a scripture that made it all better for me...but I can't.  I really do not have an answer to my struggle.  I am trusting that if I continue to bring this issue to God, he will eventually help me to understand.  I am thankful for the fact that God wants me to be open and honest about stuff like this.  

All I know is...once I start to resolve this issue with God, there is always going to be another question or doubt that I am struggling with...and that's okay.  I think it's even okay that I may be a bit angry with Him because I just want Him to be PHYSICALLY present.  

I am glad that God is real and wants me to be genuine with Him in our relationship.  

Hmmm....that makes me want to give Him a high five.  Darn it.

Some Rest...

Do you need some rest?  A sigh of relief?  Do you feel as though you are constantly trying to live up to extravagant expectations?

Yes, it is wonderful to have goals.  God wants us to grow and aspire to be more like Him.  

BUT...

When is it too much?

Read this excerpt from Captivating by Jon and Stasi Eldridge:

The wounds we received as young girls did not come alone.  They brought messages with them, messages that struck at the core of our hearts...

Debbie's father had an affair.  What made it confusing was that in many ways, he was a good man.  The message that settled in her heart as a teenage girl was, You'd better do more than she did or you won't keep your man.  After this came a young man who pursued Debbie, and then left for no apparent reason.  We've known this beautiful young woman for several years now, and one thing has puzzled us-- why is she always working on her life?  Why is she always trying to "improve" herself?  Debbie is always looking for something to work on.  Prayer, exercise, financial responsibility, a new hair color, more discipline.  Why is she trying so hard?  Doesn't she know how amazing she is?  What makes her search so frustrating is that she doesn't know what is wrong with her.  She simply fears that somehow she is not enough.

Sound familiar?

Take a deep breath, relax, and take a few minutes (or hours if you want to! this is important stuff) to soak in the facts.....

1. God loves you more than anything in this world, yes you.  He sacrificed the most precious thing He had just for you

2. He loves you right now, AS IS, exactly the way you are

3. You were made in the image of Him, you are unique and beautiful and deserving of love

...and...

You Are Enough.

Nanny Diaries

Summer jobs. Gotta love em. My job this summer is being a nanny for an extremely adorable toddler. Sometimes I like to get professional and call myself an Au pair...because I'm living with the family. Plus, it just sounds cooler.


I have been a babysitter for years now, probably since the age of about 14 when I started watching my little brother and sister for a few hours while my mom ran errands. The thing that is different about this summer is that I watch this little lady 9 hours a day, 5 days a week. I can't say that I wasn't a bit nervous about this situation. I love kids, but how would I keep her happy and content everyday, all day? So far, things have been going really well. We have become pretty good pals....as good as pals a 1 year old and 22 year old can be at least.


Through spending time with this little youngster, I have had to learn how to be more self-sacrificial. She depends on me all day for not only her basic needs, but for someone to make her laugh and comfort her while mom and dad are busy at work. Sometimes it's hard, other times it's amazing. I see myself developing a deep love for my little pal. I'm sure it's comparable, on a smaller scale, to what a parent feels for their child.


I guess what I'm trying to say is....being a parent must be hard, really hard...but it sure does seem to have it's rewards as well.


The hard stuff: temper tantrums that end with yogurt all over the floor or in some one's hair


The reward: watching her make a new discovery or getting an unexpected toddler hug


I appreciate God giving me the opportunity this summer to take a small glimpse into the life of a parent. I expect big things for this little lady...she has amazing parents and quite a vivacious little personality. I feel privileged to be able to assist in her development and growth...even if it's only a short time. I'm prepared for many more challenges...and rewards...the rest of the summer and I'm excited to see what God will do in my heart through this job.